One of my trainers recently told me a story that I have been thinking about a lot ever since. The story involved a past client of hers. When the client (let's call her Sally) first moved in to the barn, her horse was pretty wild. Sally's rides on the horse involved a lot of bucking and running around the arena. During one of their first rides at the barn, the trainer was hovering in the aisle, frequently glancing in towards the arena. She didn't want to intrude, but she also wanted to make sure that the rider was safe. Eventually, the rider got off. From the trainer's perspective, the ride had seemed completely out of control. There was bucking, there was bolting, and there wasn't much else. Unsure of exactly what to say, the trainer asked the rider somewhat tentatively, "How was your ride?"
Much to the trainer's surprise, Sally got a huge grin on her face and replied, "It was AMAZING! He was actually on the bit for three whole strides for the first time ever!"
Sally continued to have this attitude about all of her rides. It was like she didn't even notice any of her horse's bad behaviors, she only noticed his good moments, no matter how few and far between they might be. She would be riding with someone, her horse bouncing around the arena like a ping pong ball, and then suddenly the other rider would hear her call out as the horse took off across the long wall, "Oh my gosh, did you see how balanced he was on that short side back there!?" She would take a lesson, and while the trainer might feel that they barely accomplished anything productive, she would spend the whole week telling everyone how amazing that one twenty meter circle was when he paid attention and focused for a WHOLE CIRCLE!"
And, you know what? It worked. The horse got better and better. His bad behaviors diminished and his few good moments turned into full good rides. Eventually, they even wound up competing and doing quite well. Most of us likely would have focused on the bucking and bolting. While we were focused on those negative behaviors, we may easily have missed those brief moments where the horse was trying. Consequently, most of us likely couldn't have accomplished with that horse what Sally did. By noticing and celebrating his good moments and staying positive, she bought out his try, and eventually the bad behaviors that she ignored just went away.
I love this story. It's so important for us to stay positive for our horses. No one wants a boss who nitpicks on them constantly or who never notices the effort that they put in. We have to make sure that we don't let ourselves become that negative boss for our horses. When our horses feel appreciated for their good efforts, it encourages them to continue trying to do those things. Also, when we stay positive about our rides and our horses, it helps us to ride more effectively.
This week, I challenge you to be a little more like Sally. Take note of the moments that your horse is trying, celebrate him for his victories, and try to stay positive about your riding journey, wherever you may be in it. No matter how bad things may seem, there are probably some good moments too, and if you focus on them, you just may find that they start happening more and more.
And of course, if you find yourself having trouble staying positive, hypnosis is a great tool to help retrain your brain! Check out our recordings here:
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